That thing that you’re doing? Right now in presumed secret? Former Indians manager Manny Acta senses that you’re doing that very thing, and, if truth be told, he would like you to stop it right now …

It’s fine. Manny Acta did things like that at your age, too (albeit without such an “artisan’s attention to craft” about the whole thing). But just don’t do that again. At least not when Manny Acta is trying to have an adult conversation.

Actually, the more Manny Acta thinks about it, the more he believes that you should be utterly ashamed of yourself. What the hell, kid? In front of everyone …

(This piece originally appeared at FanGraphs. It has since been revised and made even worse, probably.)